AWB Chapter 33 Maybe I Like It Without Knowing It
Chapter 33 Maybe I Like It Without Knowing It
Fang Hening's voice was slightly lowered, "Song Tang."
Song Tang shuddered, realizing that he was a little excited. His fingers clasped the edge of the table, his knuckles turned white, and he felt a little out of breath.
For him, friendship is the most stable relationship. Of course he wants love, but his social fear is an unshakable mountain blocking the road of love. No one can accept a lover who suffers from social fear.
Song Tang sat down slowly, poured himself another half glass of red wine, drank it in one gulp, and took a few deep breaths before gradually slowing down.
He glanced away, not daring to look at Fang Hening, "Sorry, I'm a little out of control."
"Don't apologize, you don't have to explain this to me."
"I……"
Fang Hening looked at Song Tang, whose face was pale. The other party seemed to be frightened. Although he didn't say the words like and love, but the hint was quite obvious, and Song Tang obviously understood.
It's just that he didn't expect the other party to resist so much.
Maybe he was too impatient.
He closed his eyes, and then comforted him: "Don't worry, just say what you want to say, no matter what our relationship is, you don't have to worry about anything in front of me."
Song Tang was silent for a while, trying his best to stabilize his turbulent mood, but still didn't look at the person opposite.
He gritted his teeth, and the trembling in his voice still didn't completely disappear, "If the existence of this...love agreement makes you misunderstand something, let me emphasize again, we are just contract lovers, and we don't have any substantive relationship .”
"I—I don't want to lose you as a friend."
After more than ten seconds of silence, Fang Hening shook his wine glass casually, and said with a smile: "Why are you saying this so seriously? Of course we are friends, don't worry, this will never change."
Hearing Fang Hening's assurance, Song Tang heaved a sigh of relief, and smiled slightly embarrassingly, "Don't say such things casually in the future."
Fang Hening kept the curved lips, and his face was watertight. He didn't continue to talk about this matter, but instead said: "Leave the violin here. I don't usually use it. I will play it for you when I have a chance."
Song Tang replied vaguely, "I suddenly remembered that I still have some work to do tonight, so I won't post it for now. You should go back as soon as possible and pay attention to safety on the way."
"Are you sure you don't need it?"
"Well, it's fine."
Fang Hening didn't insist, and left the apartment neatly.
Hearing the sound of closing the door, Song Tang heaved a sigh of relief. On the surface it was a joke, but in fact they both knew that it was not a joke at all. Fang Hening's eyes made it very clear that this was a secret confession. The two of them just understood each other. Xuandi maintained the superficial peace and quiet.
But after you have substantially rejected the other party, posting it again feels inappropriate no matter how you think about it.
He turned his eyes and stared at the snow mountain rose next to him, and couldn't help feeling irritated. He didn't expect Fang Hening to like him, how could he like him?What do you like about him?
Being able to become friends with Fang Hening is not just a mutually beneficial contracted lover, he is already very satisfied.
He didn't dare to think about anything else.
He looked out of the window at the dark night, and his mood continued to sink. He couldn't accept it, but he didn't want to lose Fang Hening, his friend.
However, what will happen to them after today? He has no idea in his mind, and if he doesn't say what he has made clear, can he act as if nothing happened?
For the first time, he truly experienced the contradiction and entanglement of feelings.
Fu Zongyuan and Meng Ling went to the club and walked in together. Before they saw anyone, they heard a burst of continuous shooting. They looked at each other and walked quickly.
Looking at Fang Hening who finished shooting and put down the sniper, the opponent's irritability was obvious.
Fu Zongyuan glanced at the bullet casings on the ground, knowing that Fang Hening had been here for a long time, he looked at the man with a cold face, and asked, "What's the matter, did you quarrel with Song Tang?"
Fang Hening went to the chair behind and sat down, his expression was calm, like a frozen lake in winter.
He opened a can of coffee, but Meng Ling snatched it away. Without even frowning, he leaned back in the chair and said, "There is no quarrel."
Meng Ling put down his coffee, "What's the matter? I'm still drinking strong coffee at what time, and I won't be able to sleep tonight."
Fu Zongyuan thought for a while, and guessed: "Isn't it because you were rejected for confessing to Song Tang? I can't think of anything else that can stimulate you now. If you want to change something else, you are in Song Tang right now." Tang, instead of calling the two of us here at night."
Fang Hening glanced at Fu Zongyuan, "It doesn't affect your shrewd image to pretend to be stupid once in a while."
This is the default.
Fu Zongyuan asked back: "Aren't you in a hurry? Didn't you want to figure it out slowly? Why did you think of it and confess without saying a word? If you tell us in advance, I can give you some advice."
"Idea? Do you think Huahai sports car jewelry luxury is useful to him?"
Seeing that Fu Zongyuan still wanted to say something, Meng Ling hurriedly said: "Shut up first, you will only add chaos. What's the use of talking about it later? It is only serious to think about what to do."
Fu Zongyuan was silent for a while, then looked at Fang Hening, "So what do you mean now?"
In fact, he and Meng Lingfang He Ning's decision at the beginning was very unexpected. According to his friend's personality, what he likes and what he wants can be taken directly.
Facing Song Tang, Fang Hening had a lot of concerns, as if it was a rare and fragile item that would break if it was slightly bumped, just like that sentence, the more he cared, the more cautious he was, for fear of hurting the other party.
Fang Hening was upset and didn't speak for a long time. At this time, the mobile phone on the table vibrated twice. He glanced and saw that it was Song Tang.
When he read the news, a self-deprecating arc curled up on his thin lips, "I don't even want to see you again."
Song Tang has a thin skin, and after today's incident, he probably felt embarrassed to ask him to post it.
Meng Ling asked again: "We haven't had any contact with the Song Tang you mentioned, He Ning, what kind of feelings do you think he has for you?"
Fang Hening lowered his eyes, and chuckled after a long while. Song Tang may have more friends with him than him, and it may be that he likes him without knowing it.
He raised his eyes and said, "It's okay, he wanted to hide, and I didn't intend to give him a chance to hide."
With that said, the two will understand.Fu Zongyuan smiled and asked with great interest, "Then what are your plans next?"
"Since he said no, let's see each other first. It's good to be calm with each other."
Fang Hening's eyes flickered slightly, sighed silently, told Song Tang to go to bed earlier, said nothing else, and then greeted Qiao Yang and Liang Ying respectively, asking to pay more attention to Song Tang's situation.
On Song Tang's side, after sending the message to Fang Hening, he still couldn't calm down. He took another bath, and after coming out, he hugged the lop-eared rabbit and lay on the bed. He tossed and turned and couldn't sleep for most of the night.
The next morning he went to work normally, pretending that nothing had happened, he didn't plan to tell anyone what happened last night.
He didn't know how to face Fang Hening, and he didn't know how to deal with himself, so the best way to deal with it now is to deal with it coldly, and don't meet each other for now, so as to avoid embarrassment for him and the other party.
After the night when he broke up unhappy, he began to suffer from insomnia, unable to fall asleep, and finally fell asleep, and would have messy dreams again, unable to sleep well at all.
He tried to watch Fang Hening's works, and read all the leading and supporting roles, but it was like scratching the surface of his boots, and he couldn't really play a role at all.He wanted to meet Fang Hening, wanted to make friends with each other, but he really didn't know what to do when they met, could it really be as if nothing had happened?
It's embarrassing to think about it.
Fang Group's side, in the CEO's office.
Meng Ling looked at Fang Hening, and asked tentatively, "It's been three days, what are you going to do now?"
Fang Hening has always had his own ideas, especially when it comes to personal relationships, they never talk about it.
But now that he doesn't meet Song Tang, Fang Hening's mood is not much better. Although he is in the company, he looks lazy and absent-minded.
If you ask him, Fang Hening is completely screwed this time.
Fang Hening sighed helplessly. Song Tang really didn't make any difference to him. To be honest, he was a little worried about the other party's state. Worrying about something else going wrong.
Song Tang couldn't accept it for a while, of course he could wait for a few days, but he didn't intend to continue to let the other party refuse to meet, he could take a step back, but in fact... what he said would splash water, even if Song Tang wanted to escape, But some things are indeed different.
At three o'clock in the afternoon, he finished his work and drove to Song's company. Song Tangtang avoided seeing him.
However, on the way, he received a call from Liang Ying. When he saw the caller ID, he knew that something had happened. It was not an emergency, and the other party would not call directly.
Hearing the words over there, he was stunned and fell down the stairs?
Before he had time to think about it, he hurriedly changed his destination and rushed to the hospital.
When Liang Ying, who was guarding outside the ward, saw Fang Hening, she was frightened even though she was always calm and calm.
Cold, gloomy, paranoid, violent, crazy.
Like a dragon born lonely, facing the danger of his favorite treasure being taken away.
Fang Hening didn't care what others thought of him, he just wanted to see Song Tang with his own eyes, to confirm that the other party was really safe, standing at the door of the ward and looking at the person lying quietly on the hospital bed, he paused, then walked over quickly.
After touching Song Tang's warm hand, he slowly calmed down.
It was as if a drowning person had finally surfaced when he was on the brink of suffocation.
Looking at Song Tang's pale face, Fang Hening was annoyed mixed with self-blame. The other party's mental state was fine before they left, and they hadn't seen each other for only three days. They didn't expect to see each other in the hospital.
And after he calmed down completely, he noticed Song Tang's slightly trembling eyelashes and slightly rapid breathing——
This is pretending to sleep.
He was angry and funny at the same time. After letting go of the opponent's hand, he stood up straight and asked in a steady voice, "Are you awake? Since you are awake, why don't you dare to open your eyes and look at me?"
Song Tang naturally heard this.
After stepping on the stairs and falling down, he fell into a coma for a while, and was already awake when he arrived at the hospital, but when Fang Hening came in, he subconsciously closed his eyes, not deliberately trying to pretend to be asleep, but... still didn't know how to deal with it .
Being exposed bluntly, Fang Hening's voice was steady to a little cold, he slowly curled his fingers, took a deep breath, and opened his eyes.
But staring straight at the ceiling.
Fang Hening stared at Song Tang, watched the other's eyelashes tremble and tremble, finally opened his eyes but didn't look at him, let alone opened his mouth.
He was in a complicated mood, but the anger was gone long ago, and it was more of distress and self-blame. If it wasn't for the confession he implied made Song Tang feel uneasy, he wouldn't be able to step on the empty space on the third or fourth steps.
Thinking of this, how could he be willing to say reprimanding or scolding words.
He held Song Tang's exposed hand, his expression softened, and he said happily, "Fortunately, fortunately, it's only three or four steps, just in case..."
He couldn't go on talking, he imagined all kinds of things on the way here, and those chaotic thoughts didn't dissipate until he saw Song Tang, and then he was lucky, okay, okay.
Song Tang originally thought that Fang Hening would accuse him of being careless, but he didn't expect to hear such words. The other party's tone was obviously worried and scared. He opened his mouth, but didn't say a word.
Fang Hening held Song Tang's hand tightly, looked into those amber brown eyes, and asked softly, "Does your foot still hurt?"
Song Tang glanced in the direction of his feet, then slowly turned his gaze back, "It doesn't hurt very much, just a slight bone fracture, just rest and rest, it's not serious...don't worry."
Fang Hening sighed, and helped Song Tang straighten his forehead with the other hand, "How can you not worry, it's my fault to tell the truth this time, if I hadn't said those things, you wouldn't have refused to meet me, let alone It’s not because I didn’t post a post yesterday that I’m not in a good state today, so today’s incident will naturally not happen.”
The other party's fingertips accidentally touched Song Tang's forehead, he pushed away Fang Hening's hand, and by the way, looked away, saying: "There are often no right or wrong things like feelings, I..."
He doesn't know what to say, there is no right or wrong in emotional matters, but after he just rejected Fang Hening, he really doesn't know how to get along as if nothing had happened...still so intimate.
Fang Hening understood that Song Tang's avoidance was related to social fear, but it was not just because of social fear itself, and the more he knew, the more distressed he was.
Song Tang's avoidance of feelings is not the fault of the other party, the root cause must have been buried earlier, but he still doesn't know the specifics.
He explained: "As you said, sometimes there is no right or wrong in a relationship. The person you like doesn't have to apologize for rejecting it. This is your right, Tangtang, you are worthy of everyone's love."
Fang Hening's voice was slow and gentle, which soothed Song Tang's tense emotions well. He looked at the other party and bumped into a soft lake water unexpectedly.
Song Tang was silent, but Fang Hening felt a lot from the other party's eyes.
This glance contains too many things, including the helplessness of not knowing how to face the current situation, the slight anxiety caused by not seeing each other for more than a week, and more...the hidden grievances that are not easy to be noticed at the bottom.
He chuckled lightly, still conciliating, and teased lightly, "You don't drink well, and you don't like alcohol, but you'd rather drink by yourself, and drink so much that you don't want to see me, I'm a scourge Or what? Mr. Song—I'm really hit by you, okay?"
Fang Hening's tone was slightly resentful, Song Tang pursed his lips, and finally couldn't hold back the corners of his mouth, his restless mood was completely calmed down.
Slowing down, he confessed: "I... I'm a bit unable to get over the hurdle in my heart."
He wanted to ask Fang Hening why he liked him, why he wanted to break the current stability and balance, but he couldn't ask, so what's the use of asking?
Fang Hening said that the person who is liked does not need to apologize. Similarly, liking itself is not a shameful thing - if the other party really likes him.
Hearing the hesitation in Song Tang's tone, Fang Hening stopped sighing. He told Qiao Yang and Liang Ying to pay more attention.
But he didn't find anything wrong. It can only be said that the confession he implied seemed to have a greater impact on Song Tang than he thought, and this person was more self-repressed than he expected.
He bent down and looked closer at Song Tang's eyes, and stopped talking about what he liked, but asked softly: "Do you feel ashamed of stepping on the empty stairs? A way to keep a stable mood and be ashamed?"
Song Tang's eyes froze for a moment. He didn't expect Fang Hening to ask such a question. After staring at each other for more than a minute, he realized that the other party was looking for a step for the two of them.
He had known for a long time that Fang Hening was transparent, considerate and knowledgeable.
He pursed his lips, his tone was a little stiff, and he followed the other person's words: "It's all...you just know it, don't, don't say it."
How old is he, even if he is in a bad state of mind, but he stepped on the ground and broke his bone while walking well. Anyway, it is not an honorable thing, it is really shameful.
But at a deeper level, as Fang Hening said, it seems that he really can't do without the other party.
Such necessity and dependence on the other party made him even more at a loss.
From such a close distance, Song Tang's eyes could clearly see the burnout. Fang Hening looked at the other person's pale face, and told him: "I can't drink enough, so don't drink so much when something happens, even if there is no such agreement. , we can also be very good friends, you can find me if you have anything."
Song Tang glanced at Fang Hening, then quickly moved away.
He responded vaguely, thought for a while, and said: "I'm fine, you can do what you need to do, and don't worry about me."
"Did I just say we were good friends, or weren't we?"
"Yes."
Fang Hening stretched out his hand to caress Song Tang's side face, and asked people to turn to look at him. He slowed down his speech and asked, "It's normal for friends to help and rely on each other, isn't it?"
"Correct."
Fang Hening continued: "Since we are friends, I can't sit idly by when you need help. Could it be that you still want Liang Ying to carry you back?"
"According to your temper, the current situation probably won't go to the company. Working from home is the most suitable choice. This matter happened because of me. I have the responsibility. Before you recover, let me take care of you, okay? "
Song Tang turned his head to avoid Fang Hening's hand, but he didn't.
He didn't argue with the other party immediately, but was attracted by the temperature of this hand.
He didn't want to admit it anymore, but he was still clearly aware of his dependence on Fang Hening, not only for this hand, but also for more, more contact.
In order to relieve the clamoring desire in my heart.
The two people in the ward were silent. Liang Ying, who stood at the door with her eyes downcast and served as a background board for a long time, when she heard her name, the alarm bells rang in her heart. She had only one thought, the background board is very good, don't cue.
Facing the gazes of the two people looking over at the same time, she said calmly, "I'll ask the doctor about the precautions for recuperation."
After she finished speaking, she turned around and left neatly, closing the door of the ward behind her.
Good guy, she froze just now and didn't dare to move. Fang Hening and Song Tang were not the relationship between the gold master and the film king who was adopted. Although she didn't know what the conflict was this time, she could see one thing clearly— —
Between these two, there was an atmosphere that no one else could get in.
How was Fang Hening before entering the ward?Like a wild beast trapped in the abyss, but entered the ward, in front of Song Tang, he restrained himself extremely well, suppressed his irritability and patiently coaxed people, if he didn't value it enough, how could he do it.
And Song Tang is very close to Fang Hening subconsciously, and there are emotions that will not be shown in front of them, such as unconsciously acting like a baby.
Thinking of all the previous events, she seemed to be able to assert that Fang Hening's concern and caring for Song Tang were not just out of agreement, and Song Tang's attitude towards Fang Hening was not pure.
Protocol lover?Where is there such an agreement lover.
friend?Where do you get along with friends like this.
It's just trying to cover it up. If you want to talk about friends, Song Tang and Qiao Yang are like that. As for the two in the ward, they are obviously in a serious relationship!
Looking at the closed door, Song Tang came back to his senses, remembered Fang Hening's words, and understood what the other party meant, that he wanted to go back to the apartment with him and take care of him.
His eyes dimmed a bit. What the other party said was true. He really didn't plan to stay in the hospital all the time. He would work at home after he was discharged from the hospital, but he was going to live with Fang Hening for a while. This kind of cognition made him very resistant.
Especially when there was an unpleasant incident.
He replied half-evasively: "Liang Ying has a lot of work to do, I don't think so. I live close to Qiao Yang, if you need help, you can find him."
"Oh," Fang Hening asked calmly, "So you plan to ask him to help you take a bath?"
Song Tang choked, he definitely wouldn't.
Fang Hening sighed slightly, moved his hand and put it on Song Tang's shoulder, and said, "First of all, we are still friends. I don't have a job recently, so it's very convenient to take care of you; second, there is an agreement between us, so we have done such intimate things. ,Yes or no?"
Song Tang frowned, he was struggling.
He wanted to get back to the previous state of getting along with Fang Hening, and also admitted that what the other party said was reasonable, he didn't want to be hospitalized, no matter how good the environment was, it couldn't compare to his own home.But if he goes back, some things are really difficult for him to handle alone, and it is not an option to bother Qiao Yang. Fang Hening... is indeed the most suitable candidate at the moment.
I have done such intimate things, so it seems that there is no need to be embarrassed?
There is just one point that he still needs to emphasize again.
Sensing Song Tang's emotional changes, Fang Hening took a step forward before the other party opened his mouth: "An agreement to be a lover is just an agreement. I understand. Other than that, you just treat me as a friend."
Song Tang listened, feeling lost in a trance that he hadn't figured out yet.
He raised his hand and pushed Fang Hening's forearm, and said: "Don't do that kind of outrageous thing again, just keep the status quo between us."
"Okay, listen to you."
Speaking of this, the two of them basically reached a superficial unanimous opinion, Fang Hening was generally natural, but Song Tang still somewhat did not slow down.
After dinner, when he wanted to go to the bathroom, the embarrassment reached a point where he couldn't ignore it.
He lifted the thin quilt, and as soon as his unharmed foot touched the ground, Fang Hening pressed his knee on the other leg. Through a thin layer of fabric, the heat of Fang Hening's palm seemed a little hot.
He raised his head and gave him a cold look, "Let go."
Fang Hening was not fooled by Song Tang's attitude at all. Since the other party used indifference and alienation to cover up his inner bewilderment and tried to do the futile work of keeping a distance, he couldn't go head-on.
He knew that Song Tang was wary of relationships, just to be friends?Impossible, the other party just couldn't accept the change of their identities for a while, so he had to hint first, and let people open the hard shell step by step.
He didn't miss the disappointment that flashed quickly in Song Tang's eyes, and he shouldn't be far away from the other party's understanding.
He chuckled lightly, with a hint of a smile in his words, "I'll carry you over there, don't move around."
"No, it's just a slight bone fracture, I'm fine."
Fang Hening stared at Song Tang, who was already pale, but now he had no blood at all, which made the soft blush spread from his cheeks to the base of his ears even more conspicuous.
Much better looking than Bai Mierai.
He reminded: "You want to leave the hospital tomorrow, right? If you accidentally cause a more serious bone fracture, you won't be able to leave the hospital tomorrow."
Song Tang really hesitated now, the environment of the hospital would invisibly aggravate his anxiety, making him eager to return to his familiar environment.
If it wasn't for Fang Hening's insistence, he wouldn't even want to stay overnight in the hospital, and he would be able to negotiate a price to be discharged tomorrow.
After deliberating for tens of seconds, he put his hand on Fang Hening's shoulder, glanced away, "I'm in trouble."
"You're welcome."
Being carried into the bathroom by Fang Hening, and then carried back after washing, Song Tang froze the whole time, trying to convince himself that it was his ankle that was injured, and he would help out temporarily, don't act like you don't understand anything, just a little touch will do the trick Blushing and thinking crookedly.
Don't think about what you have and what you don't have, and don't diverge your thinking.
Don't overthink it.
Seeing the bedside, just when he was about to breathe a sigh of relief, there was a knock on the door of the ward, the two of them looked over at the same time, and then, they happened to meet Qiao Yang's gaze.
He froze all over.
Ask: What should a friend do if he sees himself being hugged by another friend's princess?
The author says:
Tangtang avoids love very much, and thinks that friendship is more stable than love, which is why he reacted in this way. The confession hinted by He Ning is equivalent to breaking the "shell" he thinks is safe and stable, and the balance is broken, so he will In a panic, you will refuse to meet because you don't know what to do, and you will be at a loss;
This is a step for him to recognize his own feelings and take a step out of the "shell". It's time to realize his true feelings later——
Tangtang and He Ning are two-way running, two-way healing, there will be some advances and retreats during the period, the whole is very sweet, very sweet, very pampered, very pampered——